Best resignation letter ever XD

Lee · #1 (**permalink**) 07-20-2007, 01:33 AM

Quote:

Dear Mr. Bakerr,

As an employee of an institution of higher education, I have a few
very basic expectations. Chief among these is that my direct superiors
have an intellect that ranges above the common ground squirrel.
After your consistent and annoying harassment of my co-workers and myself during the commission of our duties, I can only surmise that you are one of the few true genetic wastes of our time.

Asking me, a network administrator, to explain every little nuance of
everything I do each time you happen to stroll into my office is not only
a waste of time, but also a waste of precious oxygen. I was hired because
I know how to network computer systems, and you were apparently
hired to provide amusement to myself and other employees, who watch you vainly attempt to understand the concept of "cut and paste" for the
hundredth time.

You will never understand computers. Something as incredibly
simple as binary still gives you too many options. You will also never
understand why people hate you, but I am going to try and explain it to you, even though I am sure this will be just as effective as telling you what an IP is.

Your shiny new iMac has more personality than you ever will. You walk around the building all day, shiftlessly looking for fault in others. You have a sharp dressed useless look about you that may have worked for your interview, but now that you actually have responsibility, you pawn it off on overworked staff, hoping their talent will cover for your glaring ineptitude. In a world of managerial evolution, you are the blue-green that everyone else eats and laughs at.

Managers like you are a sad of the Dilbert principle. Seeing as this situation is unlikely to change without you getting a full frontal lobotomy reversal, I am forced to tender my resignation, however I have a few parting thoughts.

1. When someone calls you in reference to employment, it is illegal
for you to give me a bad recommendation. The most you can say to hurt me is "I prefer not to comment." I will have friends randomly call you over
the next couple of years to keep you honest, because I know you would it on your own.

2. I have all the passwords to every account on the system, and I know
every password you have used for the last five years. If you decide to
get cute, I am going to publish your "favorites list", which I conveniently
saved when you made me "back up" your useless files. I do believe that terms like "Lolita" are not usually viewed favorably by the administration.

3. When you borrowed the digital camera to "take pictures of your Mothers birthday", you neglected to mention that you were going to take
nude pictures of yourself in the mirror. Then you forgot to erase them
like the techno-moron you really are. Suffice it to say I have never seen
such odd acts with a sauce bottle, but I assure you that those have been
copied and kept in safe places pending the authoring of a glowing letter of
recommendation. (Try to use a spell check please, I hate having to correct
your mistakes.)

Thank you for your time, and I expect the letter of recommendation
on my desk by 8:00 am tomorrow. One word of this to anybody and all of
your little twisted repugnant obsessions will be open to the public. Never
f*** with your systems administrator. Why?

Because they know what you do
with all that free time!

Wishing you a grand and glorious day

Cecelia

, i hope some day i have the chance to write such a good letter

, i looked it up and its been posted around quite a bit, apparantly according to the sites i looked at its a real resignation letter from a female employee that worked for Zantex Computers in the USA, her boss is said to have resigned very soon after lol!